Trying to earn back what i've lost.

In 18years of life.
So many phases had passed me by.

Never was there a phase.
Which i would want to last forever.

Because I've learnt that.

Nothing last forever.

No one stays forever.

Everything and everyone comes and goes.

They will leave someday.
Just indefinitely when.
Why wait for the day they leave, i thought.

I knew it would hurt so bad.
But i just waited, till they day they left.

And then look back and think.
"Why hadn't i left first"
"Why was i there, for them anyway?"
"What was there that i could take away?"

And then i look ahead.
And i still see myself doing it over and over again.

Why is this.
Why is this i was brought up this way.

Into a family that taught me nothing.
But to put people ahead of me.
And to not stop working until i'm physically unable to do so.

I'm a boy.
I'm 18years of age.
I should be enjoying my teenage years.
Thinking no further then the weekend at the club.

But what have i done to myself.
What have i gotten myself into.

It's a phase where people are leaving now.
My love ones.
My love one.

The people who's left standing by me.
Doesn't see what i see.
Doesn't feel what i feel.

Nothing's been easy for anyone.
Why does it have to be so much harder for me.

Privileges taken away from me.
So much, taken away from me, for 1 cause.
No, i'm not complaining.

I just hope at the end of the day.
Justice will come, and tell me if what i've been though.
Would be worth it.

I am only human.
I ain't no super human.
I have feelings too.
I also want my fair share.
Why doesn't anyone understand.

Oh lord, drag me out of this moment of darkness.
For I have fallen onto bended knee.

Show me the light at the end of the tunnel.
For I have turned blind by ignorance.

Forsake me for the good and bad that i have done.
For I have to learn what's only good for myself.

Forgive me, for putting up my brave front.
For my heart has been decimated over and over again.

Enlighten me.
For i have been stupid and foolish,
To assume what i thought was best for someone.
Wasn't afterall.

Lastly, show me.
For, i'm lost.
I want to come home.
Be it alone or with company.
Show me the way home.

~Cheers.

And don't you know.
That it's wrong to take what he's giving you.
So far gone on your own.
But you can get along if you try to be strong.
But you'll never be strong.

High and dry.
Out of the rain.
It's so easy to hurt others.
When you can't feel pain.
And don't you know a love can't grow.
Cause there's too much to give.
Cause you'd rather live for the thrill for it all.

Can we just stop.

Stop coming back to the same problem.

I thought we were pass that already.

But what fuck, why are we coming back.

To the same problem again.

The persistence in me is running low.
The tolerance even worst.

The time will pass like the monsoon.
But the mind burns like summer rain.

Hail falls ever so mercilessly.
With thoughts crashing like gentle autumn leaves.

Sweet as honey were your kiss.
Beautiful as it was, those spring garden flowers.

Cold as it was every night.
Your ignorance laced my cold winter heart.

The seasons changed.
But the heartache stays the same.

Why does it have to be this way.

=))

New skin, thank's to the person incharged of doing it.

Never actually thought i'd use it.

But i'll just use it now anyway.

Not too late right? ; )

How do i, say goodbye.
To what we had.
The good times that made us laugh.
Outweighed the bad.
I thought we'd get to see forever.
But forever's gone away too soon.

I don't know where this road.
Is going to lead.
All i know is where we've been.
And what we've been through.
I hope it's worth all the wait.

I'll take with me the memories.
To be my sunshine after the rain.

It's so hard to say goodbye.
To yesterday.

Starting to feel like.

I just don't need it anymore.

What i thought i needed to keep myself alive.

I seem to be doing just fine without.

If both are so unhappy, with it.

Why not just leave it.

I sure do just feel like an extra burden on your back.

But rest assured.

I'll lighten that load.

Nightmares, can just never stop haunting me.
Seems like it's telling me something.

A bad premonition it may be...
I wonder what life ahead is going to be like.

Life without her,
How will i figure my way around?

I need some help...

I don't know anything about the future...
If only i knew...

Do what you want.

Be what you wanna be.

It will no longer make a difference.

amour compliqué.

Look at the half eaten apple...

Come home before it's too late...

It's like...

The room is always missing something some how...

Ughh..

What is it!!

Goodbye sweet days.

Hello.

You look new.

To Whom :

I don't know what you want us to do.
I don't know what you want me to do.
I just only wanted you to hang in there.
Just for a little while more.

So that i could come out, and ease the burden.
But you couldn't wait.
You refuse treatment.

And you think you are a burden.
And you think you are useless.

I haven't given up on you.
You are my closest male friend.

Please, wake up, tell the world.
You are stronger than this.

Or atleast tell me.

I'm at a lost, atleast tell me what you want me to do for you.

If a promise ain't enough, then a touch says everything.
Gotta hold you in my arms, do you feel what i mean?
Know that my heart tells me what just to say.
But words can only prove so much.
If a promise ain't enough, hold on to my love.

Though my words can't describe how i'm feeling all inside.
Does my touch say anything to you?
I'm not afraid to take time, cause i know you'll find.
That i'm real, and my touch is true.
It's taken a lifetime to find my heart, and i give it all to you.

Oh, it took a lifetime to find what i want.
I won't let it get away.

Yiliang, wants to bring breakfast for you.

But he just doesn't know how to go about doing it.

What do you do,

When nothing you do seems to do anything.

When nothing you do, seems to be appreciated.

When you watch things depreciate infront of your eyes.

Damn does it hurt.

To Whom :

I am thoroughly disappointed with you.
I know you have tried really hard to get through it.
And you were doing fine.

Why did you have to give up on yourself now?
When everyone else is still rooting for you.
When no one had given up anything on you.

You have disappointed many people.

I just hope you would re-consider, and think about things again.

Because who you are disappointing, is the people who would mean the world to you, when no one else is around.

Hope you understand where i'm coming from.

YiLiang
19

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